February 4, 2009

The missionaries in our area are Elder Smith, Elder Ott, Elder Sarver, Elder Walker, and President Ricks' two assistants Elder Swanborough and Elder Hansen. I'm going to have them in for lunch on Thursdays. Tomorrow is Thursday and a girl from Meghalaya that is investigating the church wants to cook them a Meghalayan style meal at our house. This should be fun. Also we have made friends with an Indian rug dealer here and he invited us to eat lunch at his house today. It was really good. He was too busy selling rugs and couldn't come in and eat with us but his college aged daughter who is applying to Universities in the U.S. was a lovely little hostess.
The other night we went with Elders Smith and Ott. They haggled with several auto rickshaw drivers and didn't go for the price so we just kept walking until finally we got to a main highway and we started walking down the side with tons of crazy traffic beeping and honking and whizzing zig zaggely by. After about one quarter mile on the highway, walking with many other people, some going with us and some going against , we came to a random place where people were getting onto buses . The buses were pulling in and out with no real schedule or rhyme or reason. People would just jump on and smash in as tight as possible with the majority standing in the middle isle. As the bus took off, people were partly hanging out of the doors. I was praying the missionaries weren't planning for us to ride a bus because I know they do sometimes. Finally an auto rickshaw came by and we all got in.
We traveled quite a while, then were dropped off on the wrong side of a really busy street but somehow we got acrosss safely.
Across the street on the side we had been dropped off on, the Elders pointed out a very Ritzi looking Mall. All glass and lights. They said it's even pricey in American money. It was a complete contrast on the side we were on. Our side was spooky. There were no lights and we just wound around buildings and dodged motorcycles , cars, cattle, and dogs on a very small and rutty dirt road lined with old parked cars and other unknown obstacles. We finally found the home we had come to visit but no one was there. It was a ground floor apartment at the end of a cul-de-sac of apartments. The apartment buildings had a space between the rows of about nine feet and this is where the little neighborhood children were playing. They were having great fun but I was sort of in a state of shock. The missionaries then told us that Dallin H. Oaks (an apostle of the Church) had been to this very home to give the wife a blessing to heal an ailment that she was suffering from.
After we didn't find anyone home there, we went to the end of the row and the Elders rang a doorbell that went up to an apartment on the fourth floor. These were relatives of the first family we tried to visit. We had to climb the four flights of steep marble stairs in the dark. Fred tripped and fell down giving us a scare but recovered and continued on.
Indian homes are so tiny. I don't know how they fit all the people in. They must sleep wall to wall at night. Anyway, this family is a very handsome bunch of people and well dressed. You would never suspect that they live in such tiny quarters.
This family that we visited is one of the oldest families in the Church. They all went inactive earlier last year and this is what the missionaries think might have happened.
The father died and so his wife went to the Branch President and asked if the funeral could be held at the Church. The Branch President said no. She then went to the District President who said it would be best not to go over the Branch President's head because it might offend him. As a consequence the mother was offended and she, all her children, in laws, relatives, and friends stopped coming to Church.
Now that I've learned a little more about death and funerals here I can understand the Branch President's reasoning. When a person dies here he is usually cremated on a funeral pyre (we saw one burning the other day). They don't have such a thing as embalming here and so it is very important to get the body either cremated or buried as soon as possible' especially in the hot weather.
One of the missionaries said that after this previous incident that I just mentioned, another sister member of the Church passed away. This time the Branch President, who had learned by that time that it was normal to have funerals at the Church, allowed her funeral to be held there. But since there don't seem to be mortuaries here, it is up to the families to prepare the body.
Her body was brought to the Church in a cloth bag but by that time it had started to decompose. She was taken out to the lovely little back patio where the baptismal font is located and the family tried to wash and prepare her but it was really quite a horrible ordeal. I think maybe the Branch President was right the first time.
The Mother of the first family that was offended has just come back to Church and it looks like her following is also going to get going again.
Sister Ricks said that right after someone dies, they try to have a wake, and everyone comes dressed in their worst dirtiest grubbyest clothes. Some tie rags around their heads and there is a lot of weeping, wailing, and screaming. It's a sort of sack cloth and ashes effect as talked about in the Bible. The deceased is then cremated or buried. A week later every one gathers again except this time they are in their best clothing and they have a regular funeral and everyone gets to say a few words about the dearly departed. Afterwards, they have a big meal for everyone attending.
I've been worrying about what will happen to Fred or myself if either of us die over here. Fred had a friend serving a mission in China last year who died and the Chinese government wouldn't let his family take his body out of China so they had to have him cremated. I think that might be the best for me if there is no embalming here.
I have been taking some really great pictures but we keep having problems getting them put onto the blog. My son-in-law Bryan Olsen wants to help us but we need to figure out how to get them to him. This is quite a strange and primitive world here in India, but I think I'm figuring it out better than the new age computerized world.